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Wednesday, January 18, 2017

To Parents Considering Buying Their Kids "Technology"....

I posted this on my facebook status yesterday in an effort to transparently reach out to parents on the cusp of this life-changing decision.  No, that is not an exaggeration.  Consider this an invitation to an open discussion.

For what it's worth....
  To anyone considering buying their kids "technology"....
  Buying my kids smart phones was the worst parenting mistake I have ever made. I can't blame ALL of my parental woes on that one decision- but it sent us careening down the slipperiest slope of family distruction that I never saw coming.  Sure, we had "talks" with the kids, made rules, supervised- but once caught in the independent mode of "shut out", coupled with the difficulty of a cross country move, it seems almost impossible to win them both back. The phones were just the beginning and I recently added to the chaos by buying my son an Xbox in October so that he could "keep his friends back home" by playing with them online. Right. Apparently, I never learn. I'm being completely transparent when I tell you that every day is a struggle in our relationship now.
  Please please please- be sure that you are sure when you give your kids that first smart phone, kindle, iPad, gaming console. Once you realize how difficult parenting through it is, it is too late to undo some (not necessarily all) of the damage. And to those of you who have had no struggle at all, I wish I were as strong and wise as you.


1 comment:

David @ Spiced said...

Umph...that is a struggle indeed, Marla. Robbie isn't old enough for that kind of technology, but I can see how that will be a challenge for us one day. My parents had to wrestle with a similar situation, but back in the day it was just the old NES systems. They didn't have to worry about getting online or anything like that. I feel your pain on this one. But in the end I'm sure your kids will come back around and realize that everything you are doing is in their best interest. It's not like you're a monster! Hang in there! :-P